Thankfulness

I never tend to count Sundays as the start of a week, but rather as the end. So before my week is done, here is what I am thankful for:

• Gus had a good time at our friend's son's birthday party up in Albany. He didn't make any lifelong friends, but this was another pretty accepting environment. Gus played video games for much of the afternoon, but there were a couple of teenage relatives who tried to play with him. He also played with the younger kids on and off. There was a medium sized dog, which Gus says he petted (although I did not actually see it happen). It was a pretty pleasant afternoon all things considered.
  
• I am thankful that we actually made it home from the previously mentioned party! Holy cow, what an odyssey! First we missed an exit and ended up driving into the next state. Then, once we were about 45 minutes from home, the kids were going bonkers so we thought we'd stop for dinner. Understand what I mean by bonkers – very loud Pokémon speak, kicking seats…someone was about to get dinged in the head with a Pokedex…It got so bad that DH and I were laughing. Not the 'HAHA they're so cute' laugh; the 'OMG I've just fallen off a cliff and am about to be a pancake' hysterical laugh. The exit had one of those blue signs that said we could find food and gas. We followed the arrow toward the food and gas. And followed. And followed. And followed…There was NOTHING! (I'm feeling another hysterical giggle coming on.) We drove for a good half hour to find…the next exit that would have been right where Gus's school is. So we finally found a Chinese take-out place figuring it would be fast. HA! Forty-five minutes before we got out food. With this whole ordeal, we could have drive home and back! Needless to say, I am very, very glad to be out of the car and back home.
  
• I am thankful for finishing a 24 mile bike ride safely yesterday. I rode a trail that spans 3 counties and did my farthest distance yet. I think I might meet my goal of doing a 50 mile ride this year. I'll have to start a new blog…
  

Incidentally, I'm typing on my new net book (which I am also thankful for) – yay! As nice as it was, I'm glad this weekend is done – I'm beat! What are you thankful for this week?

Small Groups

Eons ago, in another life when I taught high-school aged kids, I learned that children with certain learning styles (kinesthetic and tactile) tended to do much better in small group activities (groups of 2 or 3). I notice that this holds true for Gus. In large groups of peers, as when we are hanging out in the neighborhood, he gravitates away from the large number of kids, and it ends up being a situation where we are corralling him more than anything else. Not enjoyable for us or for him.

Yesterday, we skipped the neighborhood scene (at the last minute we were invited to a beach party with the neighbors - probably at least 8-11 kids) and went to my cousin's as planned. There were about 5 other children playing together and wow! what a difference in Gus. He still needed some redirection at times, but it was one of the most enjoyable Independence Days that I can remember with him. He played with his friends. He and MM were having such a good time we were able to stay until well past their bedtime; usually we leave right after dinner before they start getting overwhelmed. We got home around 9:30 - heck, that's almost past my bedtime!

The company clearly made a difference as well. There was a level of relaxation and acceptance that is almost non-existent when all the neighborhood kids are together. It's as if Gus doesn't exist. Who wants to do all the work of engaging this kid who always talks to himself when there are so many other, less strange, playmates around? I'm grateful that they aren't outwardly mean to him, at least most of them aren't most of the time - there are comments now and again. But unless there are small numbers, he is rarely, if ever, part of the crowd.

Gus separated himself from the kids yesterday at times, too, but it was more like he just needed breaks. When he rejoined them, he was accepted with no problem. It was just a lovely, laid back, enjoyable day.

How was your 4th?



*image by Katori Suigo via WikiTravel.

Weekend Update

I've gone far beyond the weekend, but it was so busy, this is the first chance I've had to update, and I'll have to be quick or there will be two hungry children gnawing on my kneecaps pretty soon.

Saturday we had a beautiful morning for soccer. Gus was a little sluggish because it's allergy season and the higher the pollen count, the more of a drain on his poor body resources. But he seemed to be having a good time with the dribbling drills and a short game afterward. Then it was off to our first birthday party of the weekend at a local playground. We ran into a little trouble because the park was so crowded, and he was already tired, he got overwhelmed and tried to go in every direction at once. With a coordinated tag-team effort, and a brief talking-to, he kept himself under control enough to let us know where he wanted to go if he was leaving the immediate area. One fun thing I observed was after a water balloon game. A bunch of kids were chasing after the hostesses' little brother with a large bucket of water. Instead of running away from the crowd, Gus got right in there and even helped carry the pail! The best part - no one was treating him any differently than the rest of the group. That was a great sight to see!

Sunday there was another party this time at one of the arcade restaurants. I was home working on the attic with my father-in-law (We rocked and got everything installed without any ER visits!) so I didn't get to see Gus at this party. I heard, however, that he is now hanging out in the bigger kid section playing video games. Gaming runs in his genes, so I'm not really surprised and am a bit relieved. He may have something to connect him to his peers after all!

We got back into the school day routine yesterday without any problem. I finally got to start on my book (meaning I stopped procrastinating)! Thanks to those of you who voted in my poll! What did you all do this weekend?

Tomorrow look out for a post on our dentist visit - I'm sure it will prove interesting!

Have a great night!



*image from CKSinfo.com

Soccer Opening Day and The Birthday Playdate

image from Wikimedia Commons by Nancy Heise

I've been MIA for several days mostly due to errands that forced me out of the house, nice weather and birthday stuff. I will now have a reprieve for about a week before the next round of birthday planning for MM's High School Musical un-party. (When you don't invite all the neighborhood kids, you really can't call it a party or else there will be trouble.) Three mini-celebrations done, Gus is now officially 8 and I'm wiped out! But here's an update:

Gus had his first school friend over to celebrate his birthday, which I had mentioned in my April 12th post. It turned out that only one boy came with his dad, but it was a very nice time, and probably worked out better than if both boys had come over.

In the morning, Gus started the spring soccer season, which I unfortunately missed in order to clean up (including the patio which was then discovered to be unusable because of bees - just my luck). I baked a cake, Gus got home with just enough time to change when our guests arrived right on time. This friend is not into video games (except train simulators) so the kids played a board game instead. At that point, Gus was engaged and interacting. They were all having a great time. Then I went to pick up pizza and we all sat down to eat. That was about the time that Gus went into his zone.

I think he must have just been tired, but he started trying to watch television (which we didn't allow) and became pretty laconic. Thankfully, MM stayed home instead of going to do the girl scout cookie booth with her troop. She gave E. the tour of the house and we learned that he likes fans. He was particularly entertained by the ceiling fan with the remote control. But since it was such a nice day, E. really wanted to be outdoors. We all went for a hike.

We offered to show E. and his dad the lake and DH proceeded to lead us up a wooded path that he and Gus like to take to get to our lake. I would have opted for the road, but DH didn't realize that although E. is more adept at expression and social skills, Gus is a little more agile and capable with gross motor activities like climbing and bike riding. Although he has low muscle tone (mushy muscles), poor coordination and fine motor skills, he's still something like a little billy goat when it comes to getting up and down those steep, slippery hills. Fortunately, E. and his dad enjoyed the challenge (Dad is an outdoorsy type and clearly liked the opportunity to push his son a little) and the lake was calm and absolutely gorgeous. E.'s dad tried to teach everyone to skip stones, then we trekked back through a different wooded path (I insisted on the flat path) back home for cake.

E., bless his heart, doesn't like sweets, but he was happy about a steady supply of pretzels that we had on hand. He did ask to try a piece of cake to be polite. Such a sweetheart! After a couple of hours, they left, but I think they enjoyed the laid back time they spent with us. We invited them back to go swimming over the summer, and they mentioned possibly having Gus go visit at their house. I'd call the day a success even with Gus kind of petering out. Next time, we'll have to arrange his activities when he doesn't have soccer practice.

We took a little rest and then dragged Gus back out to the yard (away from the patio and its new inhabitants) where MM made him run several relay races. But soon after he was truly done and he went back in. Everyone slept quite well last night! And as soon as DH gets back from food shopping, we're going back out, this time to hike one of the rail trails.

Have a great day!

Thursday Thankfulness

I'm a little late today, but two more walls have been given two fresh coats of paint, so please forgive me! Today's thankfulness:

1. I am thankful that Gus will be getting the appropriate and needed services in a great environment next year. Our annual review went better than I'd hoped because I was expecting a real fight on our hands.

2. I am thankful for the wonderful support from Gus's teachers, aides, therapists, counselor, and peers. Knowing that he's in a good place makes it easier to feel hopeful about his future.

3. I am thankful that I only have one small wall and the foyer left to paint, and I give kudos to people who do this for a living. I never knew how difficult a job painting a living room could be. However, as tough as it is right now, I'm going to feel damned good about myself when it's done!

What are you grateful for today?

Annual Review: Win!

Today was Gus's ever-stressful, anxiety-provoking annual review. I've been mentally preparing myself for weeks now, preparing for an epic battle. I anticipated that there would be fists banging on tables and possibly threats to call lawyers or to remove Gus from the school system. (Okay, so my imagination can get a little overactive, and I'm a sucker for a worst case scenario.)

DH took the day off to attend the meeting, and just prior to the meeting we made our last pre-battle preparations: We stopped at Dunkin' Donuts for a sugar and caffeine boost (French vanilla with extra sugar). If I've learned nothing else today, I've learned that a non-coffee drinker should never drink coffee before a meeting that will last more than 5 minutes.

So there we were, ready for the smackdown, doing mental calisthenics, readying our arguments and rebuttal. The smackdown. Never. Came.

Not that I'm complaining.

Gus will remain in his program next year with the same services (OT reduced by half an hour, but I'm okay with that). Since state testing starts next year, he will have a multitude of accommodations: word processor availability, extra time, separate room, redirection prompts, reading of directions...there may have been more, but I lost count. Summer services are in the package as well. If our luck holds, he may even be able to stay in this program (barring any drastic changes) until the end when he transitions to middle school, but I won't count my chickens just yet. A win all around.

There were some annoying moments, or maybe it was just my caffeine enhanced scrappiness. The minute I was asked about my visit to the other school that had been suggested, I started throwing around the word 'safety.' But there was no rebuttal. The chairperson agreed that it wasn't as appropriate as she thought. I got a little miffed that she mentioned that we might want to eventually consider medication for Gus (that always gets me bristling, even if we happen to be thinking about it). I let DH handle that topic, which he did very tactfully. The psychologist irked me a little when he wondered if Gus was really getting all that he could academically. My response was something along the lines of, "He's performing at grade level or higher; how much more do we need him to get right now?" Low expectations? No. I just don't feel the need to pressure Gus to be a super-genius.

There was one nice moment when the physical therapist gave her recommendations. She mentioned that Gus often runs into the middle of kickball games because he lacks safety awareness. Apparently, the kids know him now, and when they see him coming, they just wait until he's in a safe place and then resume their games. I found that to be sweet, especially when contrasted against the neighborhood kid who was giving him funny looks at the bowling alley. They haven't teased him or been mean - what a nice thing to hear!

I'll admit, I was having a really hard time behaving at the meeting this year. I'm sure the coffee had something to do with it. Maybe it had something to do with knowing that the chairperson had lied in the past regarding my son. She did get a little closer to my good side once I saw that she was being at least somewhat sincere about how much she likes Gus. A few sarcastic comments escaped, but I bit my tongue when standardized testing came up. (Because of course that's an accurate measure of what a kid can do - we all know that. Don't get me started on that one.) When the psychologist asked me to sign a permission form for something, I very nearly said, "no," just to see what he would do, but I controlled myself. However, the guy sitting next to me didn't escape my mischievous streak. He loaned me a pen and when he asked for it back, I said, "What would you do if I said no?" He didn't seem amused by that. The next time he loaned me the pen, I said I wasn't giving it back. No reaction. And they say my son is robotic. Pfft.

By the end of the meeting I was really antsy, but fortunately we had to run out of there or we'd miss the school bus. So that was our day - we were very lucky. I'm very glad to be working with the same team next year. I'll also be very glad when this caffeine buzz wears off - there's a good reason I drink tea.

So fess up, have you ever been tempted to misbehave in one of those meetings for any reason? They're long; they're stressful. It's hard not to crack under the pressure! C'mon, share your story!



P.S. I know at least one teacher friend who really ought to weigh in on the whole question of standardized testing. I threw that in just for you!